He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Randomize
