I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
