This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
not ubering you a puppy
Randomize
