i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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