the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
