How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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