He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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