What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
fuck your aforementioned shoe
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Randomize
