I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
