just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
