? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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