@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
