Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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