right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Randomize
