singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
the night ended with taco bell and tears
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
