We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
