what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
