One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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