If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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