I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
