And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
