Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
