dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
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