I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
