hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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