I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
we're so committed to being not committed
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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