I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
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