..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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