i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
