My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
