We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
