I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
These tits shall not be calmed
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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