If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
