I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Randomize
