Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
