I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
