; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Even the bartender felt bad for me
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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