this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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