The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
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