he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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