1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
