I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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