i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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