I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
