She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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