I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Randomize
