Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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