I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
it was like having sex with a tree stump
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Randomize