her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
