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Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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